I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
No, I left myself a half eaten cucumber and a beer next to my head, pointed at it and said 'you're breakfast' and then passed out.
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
This morning I learned I traded my sunglasses for a Big Lebowski sticker at the football game.
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
I am laying in your bed and just found a bottle of wine under your pillow ...should have married you...
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
yes we're having sex but I'm texting you...so what does that tell you?
Randomize
