Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
can we meet up so i can piece together the end of my night? for instance, did i jump or fall into a plant?
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
Some girl, somewhere, is going to wake up with my face paint on her vagina
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
Yeah.. I'm sorry I broke your phone. But in my defense you handed me the frying pan.
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
I think you'll be amused to know that I achieved the impossible feat of tripping over my own dick
All I know is when I checked my phone this morning google translate was open with "help the cow ate my robot" translated to French
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
Jesus I should have learned from my first marriage not to get married again
When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.
classic
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