I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
No, this is non-alcoholic oatmeal.
you know what would be perfect? if you flew in on a horse/cat holding taco bell and then you swooped me up and took me to disney world and it was magical
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
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