everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
Finished my senior thesis. How am I celebrating you ask? By drinking gas station white zif out of an empty candle holder by myself. I fucking deserve to graduate.
So we were having sex and his roommate walks in eating a bag of chips. Then proceeds to talk to us about his bitch of a professor.
Did he at least offer you guys chips?
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
That was the first time i’ve been physically intimidated by a LinkedIn profile.
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
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