PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
I think I just met the technical qualifications for binge drinking in five minutes
I woke up with fried rice in my sweatshirt pocket came downstairs and found all the chicken in the fridge gone. I'm THAT roommate aren't I?
I probably should have cut it off when he started putting queso on my nipples, but within ten minutes I was a self-serve burrito bar.
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
He showed me a picture of his baby hamsters and I called them "Mammal McNuggets"
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
You said you brought chipotle into a movie and I asked you to marry me and you said yes
A guy with a mustache poured a beer down your throat while you had a crippled boy named Sunshine riding your back
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
Randomize
