Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
I've only left my bed to pee and eat nutella out of the jar with my fingers
broke the door off of my fridge tryin to have a indoor rodeo
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
six ambien and a bong later...he was calling me blueberry princess who need rescuing from the evil oven, and he was sir Eatsalot.
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
I showed up drunk and covered in glitter, smelling like stale booze and dirty stripper and my younger brother gave thanks his life wasn’t a shitshow like mine
That’s how my thanksgiving went
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