Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
i will never coherently bang her
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
EW EW EW EW THAT PENIS BELONGS TO SOMEONE'S FATHER! THAT PENIS BELONGS TO OUR FRIEND'S FATHER! THAT PENIS HELPED CREATE OUR FRIEND! YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO ADMIRE IT!
im just sayin im driving an hr to pick her up, just cause shes your gf doesnt mean i shouldnt be entitled to a bj
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
I told him he was, quote: "A big cuddly bear" and he needed to get into my bed or I would set his Golden Retriever free.
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
I taught her to play Monopoly. She sold me her bra to keep from going bankrupt.
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
Ok thats great. so just to recap: you fucked a billionare in his penthouse last night, and I had a glass of wine on the toilet.
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