a guy in a toll booth on I-90 told me to fuck off for not being a red sox fan. i am going to miss massachusetts very much.
she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
Do you think I should still be the condom fairy for Halloween even though I'll be like.. Almost 8 months pregnant?
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
Trust me, I'm a professional lesbian.
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
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