Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
im watching my roommate bang this girl. she doesn't look like she's any good, because he has a bored look on his face...
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
half the nation just spent an hour watching a balloon fly around. we are officially the dumbest fucking country.
Threw up 3 times on the lawn mower and then proceeded to crash it into a tree root and break it.
he convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. he slurred every word. i think i found my prince charming.
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
One minute we were playing beer pong, and the next minute I was sprinting to my apartment with a watermelon. wtf happened in between?
I spent the entire party sexting people's significant others for them because they were too drunk to do it themselves. I did quite well too. I should start a business
I miss my teeeeeeeeth. They're in a bag in my hand.
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
What's the protocol for doing tequila shots at a baseball game when you're chaperoning for a church group? You know, hypothetically.
Randomize
