I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
No, I was feeling sad because all of the other girls were like model-skinny. But then I remembered that I had big boobs and went to hit on their boyfriends.
i'm at a party where swedish girls are dumping laundry detergent on each other because it glows in blacklight. this is awesome
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
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I'm not sure what happened last night, but my turtle seems afraid of me.
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
sometimes when i'm drunk i choose the spanish option on the ATM to challenge myself.
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
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I swear god is testing me by giving me awesome guys with tiny penises
Still butthurt there's a framed picture of me passed out on the toilet in my grandparents' living room
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
I yelled at the cab driver to slow down because my unborn children live here, and pointed to my uterus. I think my message was lost in translation though because he immediately offered me his card...
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
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