It's Friday. Sex?
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
My 54 year old father just sent me a YouTube link on my school email titled "Walrus sucks his own dick" and then wrote in the email "I wish I were a walrus". What the fuck is wrong with my family?
i'm high and 74% sure there's a monster in my closet
Did you guys seriously let me trade my id for a kebab last night??
You just sent me a picture of a federal crime. Like. You don't give a fuck.
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
Of course I have a pirate flag
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
Randomize
