Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
I'm functioning at the level of a challenged walrus.
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
I slept with someone shorter than me. My vagina weeps.
You fool.
I drank toilet water last night, I can't answer you because my phone is in rice.
So, last night I fell asleep sitting Indian-style on the floor, propped up against the front of the couch with an empty wine bottle in between my legs... How was your night?
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
I had sex with him in the back of my car in a duck onesie. I'm worth something dammit.
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
Randomize
