what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
can't believe I ate straight coffee grounds to stay awake for that
She asked me why there was $2 in the lunchmeat drawer of the fridge and BBQ sauce all over the kitchen... I'm not sure but I know it has something to do with you
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
She tased me when I walked in the door. Thought I was trying to steel her weed.
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
I also was calling every child by their name "Birthcontrol" - straight people are fun
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
I think I broke my hip playing drunk ping pong
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
Are you hungover?
No. I'm hiding under my covers and hoping it doesn't find me.
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