I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
i was so drunk i stopped mid-blowjob to make sure he i was with my boyfriend and not some random. twice.
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
I'm thinking he has to buy me dinner at least twice before i even start considering casting him for "Fuck buddy - understudy."
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
I wanted sex but got Ace Ventura: Pet Detective, instead. Then I had to drive 30 minutes home wet. Worst booty call, ever.
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
It's almost sad. It's like the Harambe of vagina stories really.
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
last night I used snow as a chaser
Let’s not dwell on the negatives. I have a fat ass and suck dick well.
Randomize
