Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
Pissed on my Blackberry at the Astros game. Wish me luck explaining that one at work.
So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
Welp just ran into my high school history teacher while buying a pregnancy test...there goes my veil of innocence in this town.
We were literally making dick jokes with his dick out
That’s the level of friends with benefits I aspire to achieve
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