just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
: am i supposed to send the mass text 'merry christmas!' to my booty calls too?
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
21 Of The Most Impressive Things Ever Seen In Porn
After you vomited on the patrol car, you thanked the officer for helping you up off the ground. I don't think you realized you were being arrested.
Find me a date. With a beard. I want him to rub his beard on my tits. I'm not even into that stuff but I think it'd be so warm.
Bonus points if someone shits their pants. Only 1/2 bonus points if it's you
Bonus points are bonus points regardless
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
19 Parents Had Epic Reactions When Catching Their Kids Being “Bad”
The two girls sitting next to me are asking siri "Like, uh, how do you know my name?". Do I fuck with them or fuck them?
A part of me realizes this is a bad time to text. But I override it with my awesomeness
My head feels like Jesus is projectile vomiting hammers on it
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?