I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
It's been 5 months since I last wore a condom.
Not including when spray tanning
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
If you're going to be single forever, you should try the quesalupas at Taco Bell.
Randomize
