Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
Just hooked up on shake weight girl's dad's porsche. What are YOU doing with your life?
So basically, I've just woken up in another random bed and I go to get my pants and he's wearing them. Like my underwear is in them... What the fuck is wrong with my life?
There is nothing more embarrassing than your birth control alarm going off while in a meeting with your boss and they tell you to take it.
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
Can someone please explain where the fish in the mason jar came from when we were at a bar all night?
You told the bartender if he gave you one of the fish you'd go away
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
Last night was great... In the "I got videotaped making out and getting a handjob on the couch in front of 100 people." kinda way.
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
Randomize
