If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
worst morning ever. completed my walk of shame home to find my parents, grandma, and priest had come down to surprise me on my birthday. now i'm in the car with them to go get my car from the bar.
So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
four days late. damn you, makeup sex. you win again.
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Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
So it looks like you may be an uncle real soon. Don't ask how I feel about it and don't text me back.
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
What a dumb baby whore.
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This isn't a because its valentines day booty call, it's a because your cock is phenomenal booty call that happens to be on valentines day..
I'm dressed as a caveman and drunk so that's not really an option
and then after the older sorority girl asked me his name she said "he gave me the rest of his mcdonalds and I decided to go home with him. it was the best that I could hope for my night"
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
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