I hate ducks.
What?
they're sketch. like squirrels. squirrels are sketch as fuck.
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
Went to mcdonalds... Wishing I could throw up the last 20 hours of my life.
the non-midget kid sent 8,000 texts in a month. the midget parents are pissed. THIS IS EPIC WHEN YOUR HIGH.
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
We had to coat check the pizza.
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
We lost a condom inside me, I had to fish it out. The next day he gave me a Gone Fishin' bumper sticker. True love at its finest.
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
Randomize
