i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why is it every time you ask me what I'm doing, I'm at a police station?
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
I went on a psycho cleaning spree so I feel I've earned the right to spend the day in bed watching porn and eating sausage biscuits. If you bring alcohol you can join me.
All other girlfriends are inferior. You are the chosen one.
Jus had a dream that I borrowed bob dylans car to save us from a pack of raptors. Pretty stoked about it.
I'm covered in jizz and the toll booth lady knew it
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
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