fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
Somewhere out there, someone is getting laid. And then theres me, watching Star Trek porn while my roommate plays World of Warcraft next door
you convinced me to pee myself because I was wearing dark jeans.
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
The claw marks on my back are healing nicely. Just thought you should know.
My bad. Next time I'll wear mittens.
If our text convos ever saw the light of day lives would be in tatters
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
My day in three words: secret purse cake
Being hungover in this office is the actual worst. Like they look at me and know I was wasted at 1 am, karaokeing Billy Idol at a gay bar.
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
Randomize
