you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
I'm buying eyelash glue, salt, and limes. We know how tonight is ending.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you try finding a go kart track at 4 AM on Thanksgiving
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
If you put those two in a room together it'd be like a Taylor Swift fantasy and an Adele nightmare just licking faces
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have seriously seen way too may DIY cut off jean booty shorts and half shirts on fat girls this summer. Fuck you Pinterest.
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
My goal is to have my roommate find me sprawled out in the middle of my floor naked and passed out. Maybe with some Alfredo chicken hanging out of my mouth. I don't know, we'll see where this goes.
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
Randomize