the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
i think you're the only person in the world who masturbates to food network.
two fat guys on crotch rockets just invited me to 'party' with them at a del taco. why does this keep happening to me?
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
It was so weird. She left to go to the bathroom and her older sister leaned towards me with a creepy smile and said, "You don't deserve her" and then continued to stare at me with a crazy expression for the rest of the evening.
That's kinky shit dude.
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize
