Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
I feel like royalty, that girl from last night had a vajazzled vag. Bucket list complete.
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
He said I was the "egg mcmuffin" of blowjobs. I'm flattered.
He's a little cute, in a dorky, I-know-for-a-fact-his-cock-is-huge kind of way
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
For graduation he gave me roses, a giraffe necklace, and a butt plug. I think this might be my one shot at true love
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
You gotta do what you gotta do. Like how I gotta drive in the rain to go get chicken nuggets. I just gotta.
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
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