Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
I just sneezed everywhere.....everywhere. Now no one will talk to me.
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
You told the cops that they couldn't arrest you because they weren't hot enough to fuck
We need to start having sex underwater more often.
I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
I had sex on a dinosaur comforter, tell me that does not define my life.
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.
Randomize
