Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
Just saw cops pull over the ice cream truck. What a dick
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
Seriously why is the deadbolt locked. This is the second time I'm having to sleep on the porch using my boots as my pillow. I can't wait till the next time your drunk.
Shhh, I'm sleeping. Just let it happen Jess.
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
Apparently, Mom was less-than-happy about us shotgunning beers before we opened presents.
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
I’m on my third beer doing poppers in the shower to no doubt
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
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