party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
I don't want to hear about you making out with a high schooler. I just had the best sex of my life. My face and arms went numb in the middle of it.
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
Um ... did I have a lizard on my shoulder last night at the bar?
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
Drink. Fuck. Waffle House. Repeat.
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
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