It's a beautiful day for a hangover
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
Plus my stomach has been speaking through my ass all day sending notes saying "fuck you" and "this is from your liver" or "i will kill you."
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
YOU TOLD ME THAT YOU CAUGHT A TAXI HOME. SARAH SAID THE POLICE DROPPED YOU OFF.
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
He showed up at my front door with Plan B and a rose...
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
I'm at the back whiskey bar with a 7 and 7 in a winnie the pooh costume. Come find me.
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
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