just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
i just picked a peanut m&m up off the floor. with my toes. and then proceeded to eat it.
six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
I just realized I use Twitter to keep of track of when I get drunk.
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
Today I'm judging my level of singleness on a scale of one to eat-a-can-of-frosting. It's not looking good for me.
Ooooh. Get funfetti
We went to IKEA super baked wearing fake mustaches. You?
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
Randomize
