things it involved: vodka, boy parts, possible photos of me on a cell phone. things it did NOT involve last night: my bra, his pants, and sobriety.
I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
fuck dude i blacked out on a tuesday. what am i doing with my life?
Winning.
only you would photoshop your dick
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i wish i could just hire someone to go down on me every night until i fall asleep
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
She started ignoring us once we told her we were out to celebrate your abortion. Who knew strippers could be judgemental?
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The thing is that despite the high paying career and the increased responsibility, my life hasn't changed that much. Only instead of blacking out on $2 wells at some dive I blackout on top shelf martinis in a suit. Oh and only on Fri & Sat nights. Being 30 doesn't suck as bad as everyone led me to believe.
I feel like at this point in my life I should be dating someone who doesn't run out of all his money on Mondays and have to wait til fridy to buy his weed
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
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