I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
There's 50 people in our house, none of them are wearing shirts. The keg has been relocated twice and our bathroom door is missing again...when will we ever learn?
Thank god crabs can't live on your head. Thank god.
Just got discharged from the hospital after getting my finger stitched back together don't you dare say you had a worse night than me
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
Okay so I've been talking to the mice again and they agree with me that you're a piece of shit.
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
Randomize
