if i wake u up at 5am tmrw by coming into ur room wearing nothing but my indiana jones hat and purple socks while singing 'courtesy of the red white + blue' will u be pleased or annoyed
keep in mind this isn't open to negotiation, i'm just trying to gauge ur reaction
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
well most of my day revolves around power hour
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
In my defense, there are at least three ways to die doing that, and I'm still here. America, Fuck Yeah!
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
Just watched a guy open his car door, puke, close it, and resume driving. Happy Monday.
Randomize
