She def said "you had your chance!" after telling me she had a boyfriend. Like a pile of dogshit lecturing me on how I missed out on having itself stuck to the bottom of my shoe.
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
On the bright side I got 500 American Express points paying for the abortion
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
Sorry my hands just texted you
when you come home i just want to let you know we are cats now. and we are out of eggs.
Listen I took a family sized bottle of merlot to the face last night and there's an svu marathon on. Give me some time please.
This girl I interned with got engaged today and I'm just like over here taking plan B with my tacos and PBR.
The best walk of shames are on the highway
Randomize