he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
My cousin's wedding had personal beer funnels for each table and a drinking game against the bride and groom. im sorry for ever calling you white trash
I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
porn star boner night. come get it.
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
Did you seriously just hashtag my sex life as #yolo2013?
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
wanna see your best friend chug a bottle of steak sauce?
please go to sleep
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
Randomize
