Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
i just met rob pattinson in italy. he's so stupid, i feel like i would have to say "your penis goes here!"
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
We have to go find her fucking car. She came home from a 80 dollar cab ride, no shoes, and all she remembers is its at a burger king on a street with an H in it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I could swear I did coke with Jesus last night
just so you know, you can get through airport security with handcuffs no questions asked
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
Fuck it, I work hard. I deserve nice sex toys
havent showered in 2 days. just Febrezed my balls in the car before going into a movie alone with a 40 of Guinness.there isn't a word in English for how single I am.
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
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