yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
Killed two birds with one stone: found my wallet and unclogged the toilet.
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
You know, be my cock's hype man.
You told me that you only walk into walls because it makes the room stop spinning.
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
He was all like, "I think ur the one that got away and I miss you." I replied, "I gave u a hand job once in your hot tub. No need to wax nostalgic about it."
You know it's been a successful day when the only reason you put on a bra was to take off your shirt
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
Who died my cat blue again?
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
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