Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
Stop thinking your God dude. You passed out. God doesn't pass out...
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
STDs are my biggest fear, besides whales. They're so fucking big.
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
There is nothing worse than the batteries of your vibrator dying on valentines day
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
Randomize
