garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
I just saw an easily 300lb shirtless man on a Vespa. My day has been simultaneously made and ruined.
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
Listen, dont tell me about your day or that your mom is in town. Don't ask me to drive you to the airport or proofread your paper. Text me when and only when you have a boner. Oh and take your pants off and leave your front door unlocked because I'm coming over.
Should I be concerned that the new guy I'm seeing just referred to my stealing a sailboat in college while drunk as "wholesome"?
it's like the easy bake oven version of plastic surgery
You weren't singing into a microphone in front of an audience. You were screaming into your fist in the check-out aisle in Walmart.
My boss just offered me a vodka mixed drink at work I do not have a real job
Randomize
