I wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commercials.
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
Is puking blood really that bad of a sign? Can we pretend this is okay?
It's okay.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
We told you to stay put for 2 minutes. We come back out and your being handcuffed yelling "DO YOU FEEL LIKE A GOOD FUCKING PERSON ARRESTING ME ON MY BIRTHDAY?!"
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
I am compiling a playlist that reminds me of all my best sexual encounters. It shall be called THE MUSIC OF MY VAGINA'S PEOPLE
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
Randomize