Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
Just realized I have to keep sleeping with him... those scars from drunk sex on the 4th of July are still on my back and lord knows I'm not about to explain that to another guy.
i'm way too high for it to be safe that i just discovered i have a fire extinguisher
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
We don't watch enough power rangers
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
VAL. THIS MOTHERFUCKER IS LAYING IN MY BED WEARING A CAT SHIRT, VAL. COME SAVE ME, VAL.
No he can't come. I swear to gods he's "Why We Can't Have Nice Things" given physical form.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
The best thing about last night is when drunk Lauren asked cop if she could smoke a joint in front of him. And next thing I remember she’s smoking weed with a cop. How awesome is that.
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
he went down on me WHILE i ate BACON PIZZA! best. boyfriend. ever.
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