i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
you were definitelymotorboating random chicks as they walked out of the bar. just like, down the line. you kept yelling "Motor Boats for everyone!!!!"
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
sitting next to michael phelps in the airport. wonder if he's carrying...
there are 2 things i love giving: blowjobs & backrubs. how can i tell them that without sounding like a slut
You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
Apparently she held up my head the entire 40 minutes, convincing the cab driver that I was okay
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some guy in lab is humming along to a Sara Barrilles song. Or maybe I'm just hearing the song echoing in his huge, gaping vagina.
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
i literally have the attention span of a weasel on steroids, but yeah, i know who you’re talking about.
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