ugly people sure do ruin things
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
when i grow up i'm putting garbage disposals in all showers of my house so when you vomit in the shower its easy clean up
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
Ok just don't go to jail. I saw your account balance. It can't take that.
The dog just sneezed and it sounded like a person, after I said bless you I freaked the fuck out and got the gun
Also-when I die, I want it to be with my arms above my head so that when rigor mortis sets in, my breasts are perky.
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
I might as well just sew it shut at this point.
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
This toilet bowl is my home.
She's chasing the cat around the house hitting it with a cardboard sword yelling "there can be only one!"
Randomize
