He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
He told me that he wishes our relationship was more like prison: less touching, more butt sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
I woke up with a fake mustache stuck to my chest and I can't even hold down water.
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
this is a save-me-from-tijuana-tequila-and-hoookers booty call. if i don't hear from you by 8pm i'm grabbing my passport
if i'm not back tomorrow call the embassy
He just stopped me mid blow job so he could text his wife asking for TacoBell.
dude pick up your phone
i cant. im high and theres a wild turkey in my backyard. wouldnt miss this moment for anything
Well the grass always *looks* greener on the other side but sometimes that’s bc there’s a sewage runoff...
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