I feel like your standards for women is like rent-a-centers standards for credit.
Iced coffee. Banana. Two dumps. Life is good.
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
Last time I "ran into him" I ended up with the clap and had to explain why the ladder was missing from the garage.
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
He kept trying to make out with me but I was just trying to show him Shrek memes
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
Dad literally changed the channel from an episode of Big Bang Theory to another episode of Big Bang Theory. That's why I hate this show.
Randomize
