Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
Aren't I supposed to sit on your face?
I didn't black out, the guy in the Men In Black costume erased my memory
Just passed on a threesome. I'm too old for that kind of morning after.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
i realized really quickly that drinking a bottle of vodka and 3 crystal light packets wasn't the best idea i've ever had
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
I was dressed as Waldo and the cops kept saying looks like we fuckin found you
What's a really polite way of saying "you have gravely overestimated the value of your vagina?"
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
Randomize