Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
A very confused plastic surgeon just called. Apparently I called asking how much it costs to get a vodka funnel installed straight to my brain...
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
I'm basically cruising around listening to 90's gangsta rap with my meatball sub telling people to go fuck themselves
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
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