whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
He brought me another shot of rum, ice and my underwear when I woke up.
What a gentleman.
I KNOW, right?!
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
Randomize
