I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
I might come over. Something about you makes me matronly and I have this urge to nurse you back to health with soup and a blowjob
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
"Every minute you spend hanging out with David is a minute you could spend meeting someone new, who isn't a huge douche" - Buddha
Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like.
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
Sex on the scooter in the parking lot wasn't the smartest idea. Actual quote from the cop as he handed me the ticket and fist bumped me.
Did I run into a tree or get punched in the face?
Both.
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
When I woke up I had 6 missed calls making sure I was ok and asking if I remember showing my tits to a picture of her baby.
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
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