Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
Alex texted me. Bootycall boy #2. its like an alarm goes off once i'm single that the line is open again
Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
he just found out the funeral is this morning so i'm wearing last night's clothes and look like a total slut.
So I've officially decided that I AM that drunken mistake that girls hate themselves for in the morning.
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
Hey, who is this? Sorry, you're in my phone as "you better remember".
Is everyone touching their nose at me a sign that I should stop snorting vicodin off my phone in the bathroom at school?
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
Building a door into the garage so when I bring girls home my mom doesn't wake up.
Pathetic yet considerate
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
Just got your voicemail. The 3am call wasn't a drunk dial, it was an I left my phone in my pocket then has wild animalistic sex dial...
I hate you.
You LOVE me.
Randomize
