I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
im gay
i know
yea but for you.
Once again you get dinner and all I get is semen on my leg
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Holy shit. Do you realize what this means? Officially all of my ex-bfs are either dead or gay
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
I just made a steamroller out of a christmas ornament. I feel so festive.
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
No more house parties. We're almost fucking 30 years old and I slept until 6 pm.
He hand fed me trail mix then I watched the video of me the next morning. He was actually feeding me meow mix.....that drunk. I still have no regrets marrying him
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
Did you put my shoes in the freezer.
Nope. I did however put them in the kiddie pool you pissed in in the living room before Tyler put them in the freezer. Ass hole.
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