my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
Woke up this morning on my couch at 6am fully dressed including heels, holding half a corn dog. I called you last night when I was buying the corn dog from a street vendor, I think.
I am in love with you.
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
Her life is filled with shit luck. Its like mother nature is having her period and just taking it out on her specifically.
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
After you puked in the bathtub you claimed you were never eating quesadillas again and you never even ate a quesadilla
you were angry and didn't have anything else to throw so you threw a breakfast burrito...?
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
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